Smudger105e

Twatt on Shetland is not on the A966. On the other hand, Twatt on Orkeney is http://www.multimap.com/map/browse.cgi? ... picon=true Could only find two Twatt's though... more then enough for any man I suggest!!

I've got to agree with Daggle here, I know several coppers quite well, my best mate is married to an officer. Do people really think that anyone who wants to be a police officer does it to a) Be a little Hitler Nick any motorist they can c) Go on a power trip d) any other ** insert random insulting comment here** My wife works as Probation Officer with a Youth Offending Team, and in her experience the vast majority of police officers do it for the right reasons, i.e. to make the locality a better place to live, to catch criminals and reduce recividism (sp?) rates.. Yes, the Police do get it wrong in our perceptioin from time to time, but the Law is an also ass at times. If I caught someone damaging my car, and I broke their fingers, I would be the one in court. Sometimes a Police Officer gets it wrong too, as I'm sure Daggle will agree he does from time to time. Don't we all have a 'bad day at the office' some days? And as LM has proved, if the Police Officer gets it wrong, he is answerable for his actions. Perhaps that Officer had a row with his wife before work, and didn't feel like giving a mother the benefit of the doubt? Don't you sometimes wish you could prosecute that guy using his mobile 'phone, or the doris hogging lane 2 on the motorway?

Yes Rich, she went for her first scan 10 days ago, got another at the end of next week I think...

Damn, missed that thread

I was going to post this in the jokes forum, but as it's supposed to be true, I am posting it here! Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford: Dear Mrs. Murray, While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics. Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras: 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle. 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened. 5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas stove. 7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it. 9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were. 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again." And; last, but not least: 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here." Yours sincerely, Charles Brown Store Manager

Is it right that the motto for all people who live in East Anglia is "carn't read, carn't roite, drive tractaaaar"?

Think I might have to post the scan pics of my first Grandchild, due in May. Uncle Burns sounds good too!! lol

Maybe he should spend his earnings on a new toaster...

Anyone remember the Chumbawumba record? It reminds me of that!!

I bowl there twice a week... Ilkeston Fair, the week after the Goose Fair in Nottingham http://www.flickr.com/photos/burningoutofcontrol/345657208/ Errm, yes. This is where Burns used to work...

The load should be central on a weigh bridge though, how can that be if there are only one pair of wheels on it? 55 kg is bugger all, I bet some of you lot don't even weigh that, although I weigh almost twice 55 kg

Superbowl tonight, lie-in tomorrow and might get the Super Deluxe out and sort the brakes (they were over tight when I picked it up, and see why it's running like a BL motor, could be the petrol that's been in it since 1999...

Looked like serious fowl play to me...

Susan Tully!! PHwooarr. lol

So you Do watch it then Daggle...

Aqua, they sung Barbie Girl. And definitely

"come out, you're surrounded by armed bastards" "Result, fanny in the flat" top programme..

There's a capri in Looms Breakers in Derby for £395!! Shall I post a piccy I took on my 'phone?

Yes I do forget my age (22 is such a difficult number), and I listen to Radio 2 too

Put Burns and me down for one place, we'll share a car...