Inspirational Quotes ....

[Mk2Jo]

I was searching the WWW for an inspirational quote to put in my location and I came across this one .... I had to put it on here because it made me laugh and I think it must have been written for more than one person on OSF (with all the in depth debates that we've been having lately )

 

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

 

Mk1Gaz

 

 

Anyone got any other funny or inspirational quotes they would like to share??

[Stu_B]

I used to look on here quite regularly

 

http://www.quotationspage.com/qotd.html

[ZetecVan 2.0]

You can't polish a turd.

 

Sheriff Buford T. Justice - 1977

[4parajon]

It just so happens......

 

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

Sacha Guitry

 

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other but still they stay together.

Hemant Joshi

 

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

 

doris inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

Dumas

 

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a doris want? "

Sigmund Freud

 

I had some words with my wife; and she had some paragraphs with me.

Anonymous

 

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

Henny Youngman

 

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."

Sam Kinison

 

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

James Holt McGavran

 

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't."

Patrick Murray

 

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming

1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,

2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

Nash

 

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...

Anonymous

 

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

Henny Youngman

 

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

 

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Milton Berle

 

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.

Anonymous

 

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

Anonymous

 

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"

Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

[GT_Jim]

if your going to be a bear be a grizzly

 

system+environment=universe

[Mick The Mig]

Last night my wife and I acheived complete sexual compatability. We both had a headache.

[surfingturnip]

one or two of my favourites:

 

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing, and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.

Henri Nouwen, Out of Solitude

 

The simplest pleasures in life are the ones we should be most grateful for, because it is having them that reminds us of why we are still alive.

David McBride

 

Who dares wins

SAS

 

Just because you get older doesn’t mean you need to let your immaturity die with your youth.

David McBride

[Mr Sam]

FPMSL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[thefatcapri]

He who dies with the most toys wins

[mr squidian]

"your here for a good time, not a long time"

 

makes me want to get into rallying everytime i here it

[Guest MK1gaz]

Tic Tock tic tock goes the clock and the clock don't lie

[razersedge]

beware of the man who knows it all because in reality he knows nothing at all

[Gibson]

if you dont push the little red button you will spend the rest of your life wondering what it did.... push it... go on.... youl regret it if u dont....

 

 

oh wait thats not a motto, thats what my subconscious

[Vista]

Today we did what we had to do. They counted on America to be passive. They counted wrong -- Ronald Reagan

 

 

But my own favourite is more recent and comes from a great speech: -

 

But if you are ferocious in battle remember to be magnanimous in victory

 

 

 

And the whole speech?

 

We go to liberate, not to conquer.

We will not fly our flags in their country

We are entering Iraq to free a people and the only flag which will be flown in that ancient land is their own.

Show respect for them.

 

There are some who are alive at this moment who will not be alive shortly.

Those who do not wish to go on that journey, we will not send.

As for the others, I expect you to rock their world.

Wipe them out if that is what they choose.

But if you are ferocious in battle remember to be magnanimous in victory.

 

Iraq is steeped in history.

It is the site of the Garden of Eden, of the Great Flood and the birthplace of Abraham.

Tread lightly there.

 

You will see things that no man could pay to see

-- and you will have to go a long way to find a more decent, generous and upright people than the Iraqis.

You will be embarrassed by their hospitality even though they have nothing.

 

Don't treat them as refugees for they are in their own country.

Their children will be poor, in years to come they will know that the light of liberation in their lives was brought by you.

 

If there are casualties of war then remember that when they woke up and got dressed in the morning they did not plan to die this day.

Allow them dignity in death.

Bury them properly and mark their graves.

 

It is my foremost intention to bring every single one of you out alive.

But there may be people among us who will not see the end of this campaign.

We will put them in their sleeping bags and send them back.

There will be no time for sorrow.

 

The enemy should be in no doubt that we are his nemesis and that we are bringing about his rightful destruction.

There are many regional commanders who have stains on their souls and they are stoking the fires of hell for Saddam.

He and his forces will be destroyed by this coalition for what they have done.

As they die they will know their deeds have brought them to this place. Show them no pity.

 

It is a big step to take another human life.

It is not to be done lightly.

I know of men who have taken life needlessly in other conflicts.

I can assure you they live with the mark of Cain upon them.

 

If someone surrenders to you then remember they have that right in international law and ensure that one day they go home to their family.

The ones who wish to fight, well, we aim to please.

 

If you harm the regiment or its history by over-enthusiasm in killing or in cowardice, know it is your family who will suffer.

You will be shunned unless your conduct is of the highest -- for your deeds will follow you down through history.

We will bring shame on neither our uniform or our nation.

 

It is not a question of if, it's a question of when.

We know he has already devolved the decision to lower commanders, and that means he has already taken the decision himself.

If we survive the first strike we will survive the attack.

 

As for ourselves, let's bring everyone home and leave Iraq a better place for us having been there.

 

Our business now is North.

[Mr Sam]

never have so many owed so much to so few

[Copey]

Si vis pocem, para bellum - if you want peace, prepare for war