How to keep a healthy level of insanity!!

[8ball]

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a

hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

 

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

 

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries

with that.

 

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".

 

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten

over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

 

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds".

 

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy".

 

8. Don't use any punctuation.

 

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

 

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious face.

 

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

 

12. Sing along at the opera.

 

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds

all day at work.

 

14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

 

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party

 

because you're not in the mood.

 

16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock

Bottom.

 

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won! Its the

third time this week!!"

 

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling,

 

"run for your lives, they're loose!!"

 

19. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are going to

have to let one of you go."

[Dr Feelgood]

lol thats brilliant!!

 

atm and diet water are amazing

[countrybumpkin]

i'm going to try as meny of them as possible anyone have a hair dryer i can borrow?

[mk1super]

Iam liking 18

[8ball]

hehe i thought ye would like them

 

i have a rake of things to do when u are in tescos il put em up some time f ye want?

[countrybumpkin]

hehe i thought ye would like them

 

i have a rake of things to do when u are in tescos il put em up some time f ye want?

 

please put them up i'm going shopping tomorro evening

[8ball]

done

[Trevmk3]

loving these, i have done the "do you want fries with that" to an old bloke at work who asked me to do some forklifting for him but i think it was beyond him

[Copey]

haha, you can actually buy diet water now, weight watchers

 

some of those are fantastic though!

[richie_stix]

spot on... even better than 13 things to in tesco... specially the zoo, intray and hairdryer ones!

[8ball]

had them for ages so said id bring a little laughfter to every one