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Posted

(Out side work at the moment there is a bloke painting in a Cherry Picker.)

 

The missus just came and seen me and said the 'APPLE CATCHER' has broken down with the man in it!!!!

 

Dont you just love em!!!!! :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

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Posted

:lol::lol:

 

I had a good one from my girlfriend a month or so back.

 

As we were eating our starters she asked

 

"Does those Buffalo wings really come from Buffalos?"

 

Me (desperately trying to keep a straight face)

 

"Yes dear, they're amputated at birth coz it's generally felt that flying buffalos would be very dangerous"

 

 

It took about 15 seconds for me to get kicked under the table.

Posted
:lol::lol:

 

I had a good one from my girlfriend a month or so back.

 

As we were eating our starters she asked

 

"Does those Buffalo wings really come from Buffalos?"

 

Me (desperately trying to keep a straight face)

 

"Yes dear, they're amputated at birth coz it's generally felt that flying buffalos would be very dangerous"

 

 

It took about 15 seconds for me to get kicked under the table.

 

i didnt keep a straight face...she promptly gave me a badgemans (she is a wren)

Posted

always remebember a quite dull blonde asking if the 24 hour petrol staation is still open! :lol::lol::lol::roll: [/code]

Posted

LMAO! A little while ago down the pub they bought out some bbq ribs, my friends dopey sister asked what ribs they were, so messing about I said they were chicken ribs, about a week later she come up to me and said in a very matter of fact way that were pork ribs and chicken ribs wouldn't have been so big!

Posted

well i think i can top those, i took my girlfriend + the kids up to london. and we went into the national gallery for a bit of culture!! they had a monet to picaso exibition on + we were looking at the famous sunflower picture (worth about 20 million quid i think) + she says in a very loud voice " thats s**t! well it was dead quiet in there + people were standing with their mouths wide open. i shuffled my way out very quickly, i said to her i cant believe you said that, but she just shrugged her shoulders + said but it was s**t. women dont you just love em.... :oops::oops:

Posted

we"ve just been to my sisters for a family dinner ( italian meatballs and spaghetti ) and my Frankie asked :

 

" so Nanny , what animal do you get these balls from ???? " :shock:

 

:lol::lol::lol:

Posted

I live in a fishing village and we would get alot of people down from belfast for the summer to go to caravan parks and the like. Well anyway one day coming back into harbour in a fishing trawler this fella about 13 shouts down to us in a broad belfast accent 'here mate is that a prawn boat?' I looked up at him and shouted 'nah its a chicken boat mate'

 

He turned round and shouted 'see da i told you you were wrong!'

Posted
driving through princes risbourough one day i looked up and said

 

"cor look, a red kite"

 

missus replied.....

 

"you idiot, thats a bird"

 

LMAO I think she's the winner so far :D:D

Posted

after watching a long (and prob boring chick flic) on dvd once I told the mrs to rewind it while i made some coffee, took her about 20 secs to work out the rwd button didnt do much, fook me i laughed 8)8)8)

Posted
why werent you in the cherry picker painting ? why is your good lady doin all the hard work..... lol

 

NO! The cherry picker was being used by two blokes painting the side of the ship. She was watching on the jetty!!!!! Read it!!! :roll:

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