Daggle Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 Got the idea from my last post, what things have you done at work that you wish you hadn't done... Here's another one of my stories from being a YTS trainee..... In the dealership that I worked for it was common practice to undergo some sort of daily punishment, one such time was when, the mechanics thought it would be a great idea to stick me in one of the bins, I was shoved in headfirst with another black bin placed over the top of me, the 2 handles were then cable tied together so that I couldn't get out, I was carried onto a ramp and taken up into the air and told not to move too much.... this wasn't too much of a problem, until some twat thought it would be funny to fire a CO2 fire extingusher into the bins, this used up all the oxygen and I was left fighting to breath, no-one had any wire cutters and everyone could see that I was struggling inside, I was eventually released, my lips were blue, and I then passed out, I don't recall getting into the toilets, but the next thing I remember was chucking up on the floor..... I bet the apprentices of today don't get that sort of thing happen to them nowadays.....
sambo Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 Whoa!! The worst i got was being sent to get a left handed screwdriver! yet alone nearly killed!
Pipster007 Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 If only Twinkle was there to give you the kiss of life, eh Daggle I was always wanting to be sent off for "A long weight." I knew I would have had to take a book with me and nobody would see me until going home time And voila, that meant a day of not doing a single bit of work
Daggle Posted January 16, 2007 Author Report Posted January 16, 2007 Ok, another one was when a mate of mine was cable tied to a chair on castors, his whole body was wrapped in masking tape apart from just his nose, his whole face was covered, he then had water poured over him, whilst having a petrol can held under his nose. He believes that he is having petrol poured over him, the ppl invloved then started flicking there lighters around his head, he literally sh**s himself and is wheeled out into the car park, where he is left for 1/2 an hour...... Needless to say if any of you f***ers are reading this then, I hope that your kids get the same treatment when they are at work..... And yes if I catch you speeding then revenge WILL be sweet.
Slik 50 Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 when I was doing work experiance I got sent to this plumbers merchants which was a bit a lagh and dead laid back. As I as only there for a couple of weeks it was my job everyday to go and get the dinners from the various local shops. I was called into the owners office to go and get his order. Now bare in mind I was wanting a summer job there so I was sh*ting myself that I didnt screwup his order. He wanted a KFC but didnt want red meat on his sandwich as he recently had a hart bypass and couldnt eat red meat, If he was to eat red meat he would die So like a comlete prat I went into KFC and catagorically stated that I was NOT to have red meat on his chicken sandwich or my boss will die! The girl behind the counter just p*ssed herself laghing at me and I have not been back in since
Daggle Posted January 16, 2007 Author Report Posted January 16, 2007 when I was doing work experiance I got sent to this plumbers merchants which was a bit a lagh and dead laid back.As I as only there for a couple of weeks it was my job everyday to go and get the dinners from the various local shops. I was called into the owners office to go and get his order. Now bare in mind I was wanting a summer job there so I was sh*ting myself that I didnt screwup his order. He wanted a KFC but didnt want red meat on his sandwich as he recently had a hart bypass and couldnt eat red meat, If he was to eat red meat he would die So like a comlete prat I went into KFC and catagorically stated that I was NOT to have red meat on his chicken sandwich or my boss will die! The girl behind the counter just p*ssed herself laghing at me and I have not been back in since Ha-Ha, bet you can't get a job in KFC either
Jimbob-Squarepants © Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 Hhhmmmm, I am struggling to remember. When I was sent on work experience years ago to the LEB, I was told about a young lad who was initiated by having a broom handle put through both his sleeves, then he was placed over the gap in the 4 poster ramp while his collegues sent the ramp up. He was hanging by a broom for a few hours. Some other lad was hung up by the rafters for a while, then stripped naked and strapped to the back of one of the companies flat bed recovery truks. The truck then drove around Beckenham for a while with the lad on the back. Me on the other hand, well.... I have pretty much escaped this sort of thing, mainly because I am a nice chap, but, there was a time when I was run over by a Nissan Almera in reverse. My mate at work thought it would be funny to rev it up and get me worried. Me being the trusting type, thought, "he wont dump the clutch, no... no he wont." Yeah, famous last words. Oh, nearly forgot, at another bodyshop I worked at, my old Capri was graffiti'd with masking tape. I spent 30 mins untaping the obsenities that they kindly left for me. I very nearly missed the front number plate which read "I Love Dry Anal S*x" Those were the days
orionmojo Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 my m8 was locked in the dog kennel with a stinking blanket and forklifted onto some racking for the day whilst on work experience
Wessie Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 PMSL @ all your storys ! i worked in a bodyshop and got sent for tartan paint
orionmojo Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 PMSL @ all your storys ! i worked in a bodyshop and got sent for tartan paint hee hee. thats a cracker theres the sky hook, glass hammer, long wait and a new bubble for the spirit level i did my work experience in a music studio, i got left stranded at the top of a rack (it was bloody huge), you have to climb up a ladder and drag the top ones off, then pass them down. only they took the ladder then also got deafened a few times
Daggle Posted January 16, 2007 Author Report Posted January 16, 2007 Jimbob, you just reminded me of another one... My old mum had a D reg Fiesta and used to park it in a private car park belonging to a company that my dad worked for, this place was huge and I spent many a happy time ragging the a**e of her little Fiesta round the car park. One day I told my mum that I would wash her car for her and I needed the keys to move it up to the wash bay. My mate Ian was with me and I came up with the great idea that I would recreate the National Hot Rod World final and drive around with my mate sitting on the side of the wing and bonnet. Off I go around the car park, getting up to about 30mph when Ian starts sliding off the front of the car. Im left with 2 choices, do I speed up and hope that the force pushes Ian back against the windscreen and he can grab hold of the wiper blades or do I hit the brakes and hope I stop before I run him over. I choose option 2, so I slammed on the brakes and saw Ian disappear off the front of the car, the Fiesta stopped with Ian pinned by the O/S/F wheel, his back is against the wheel and he cant move. I jump out and Ian screams at me "GET THE EFFIN CAR OF ME" or words to that effect anyway, so I jump in and start the car up forgetting that in my haste to make sure my mate is ok I have left it in gear...... Ian ended up with a nice tyre mark up his back and no permanent damage, but a great story to tell down the pub whenever we meet up
ZetecVan 2.0 Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 Jimbob, you just reminded me of another one... blah blah mate on bonnet blah blah 30mph blah blah braked hard blah blah pinned against the tyre blah blah started it up in gear And this man is there to PROTECT us??
Daggle Posted January 16, 2007 Author Report Posted January 16, 2007 Jimbob, you just reminded me of another one... blah blah mate on bonnet blah blah 30mph blah blah braked hard blah blah pinned against the tyre blah blah started it up in gear And this man is there to PROTECT us?? I think the term is Poacher turned Gamekeeper...YKT
Gonzo Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 fortunately i never suffered any of that but got ribbed for days after machining something 20mm oversize while working as an appo at a pump factory... still get reminded of it whenever i go back for a visit...
antz Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 when i was 15 and working in a haven holiday camp and the 4 chefs sent me for a bubble for a spirit level and guiness head whitener. been only 15 i had no idea i was been conned and it really upset me so i sat in tears YES TEARS in the little staff room for 20mins until the boss noticed me blubbering. i tod him the story and he went mental at them for wasting time he paid them for and for upsetting someone (bear in mind these guys were about 30 and 1 was over 20stone ) only 1 came and appologised and said he was only playing and we were great mates after that two i never spoke to again and the 20 stone f**ker got sacked a month later for punching the boss!
orionmojo Posted January 16, 2007 Report Posted January 16, 2007 when i was 15 and working in a haven holiday camp and the 4 chefs sent me for a bubble for a spirit level and guiness head whitener. been only 15 i had no idea i was been conned and it really upset me so i sat in tears YES TEARS in the little staff room for 20mins until the boss noticed me blubbering. i tod him the story and he went mental at them for wasting time he paid them for and for upsetting someone (bear in mind these guys were about 30 and 1 was over 20stone ) only 1 came and appologised and said he was only playing and we were great mates after that two i never spoke to again and the 20 stone f**ker got sacked a month later for punching the boss! poor kid LMAO!. i would've doe the same thing at 15 mate. its amazig how your view of the world changes when you leave school
ratman Posted January 17, 2007 Report Posted January 17, 2007 The best one guys who I worked for when I left school got me to do was to go to our local midland bank (now im showing my age ) I qued up for ages on a friday lunchtime got to the counter and there was the most sexy girl i had ever seen so i stood there like a compleat cock smiling she said can i help you and i said the guys at work want to know when the sale starts she laughed and said think where you are I nearly died also got sent to the electrical shop for a box of assorted sparks and to make shure I got lots of blue ones
spooner Posted January 17, 2007 Report Posted January 17, 2007 sorry guys but i used to be one of the horrible baskets playing joke's when we'd get a new boy,used to make crisp packet bombs filled with act/oxy mix with a fuse (makes a hell of a bang). then send them to dinner,let i'm sit in the staff room all quiet for 10 min's,then burst in with a black bag inflated,with a fuse lit in the end (only filled with air ) and lock the door!!!! you could hear the screams for mile's.
Cookie Posted January 17, 2007 Report Posted January 17, 2007 sorry guys but i used to be one of the horrible baskets playing joke's when we'd get a new boy,used to make crisp packet bombs filled with act/oxy mix with a fuse (makes a hell of a bang). then send them to dinner,let i'm sit in the staff room all quiet for 10 min's,then burst in with a black bag inflated,with a fuse lit in the end (only filled with air ) and lock the door!!!! you could hear the screams for mile's.
Gonzo Posted January 17, 2007 Report Posted January 17, 2007 My old man did that at work! Only him and his mates filled an entire binbag full of it and stuffed it in a galvy dustbin. blew the bin apart [they never did find the handles] shifted every tile in the ceiling and made everyone within a 3 block radius come out and wonder what the feck was going on! he said they couldn't hear anything for about an hour afterwards.
Smudger105e Posted January 17, 2007 Report Posted January 17, 2007 One I was tried with when I was an apprentice.. Fitter: You know when you have a w*nk in the bath, the spunk floats? me: Does it? Fitter: You were supposed to say yes!!
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