Jeff HPE Motorsport Posted July 26, 2009 Report Posted July 26, 2009 Talking to a dial-a-ride driver: Knob: I used to have loads of those Mk2 escorts. Me: It's a Mk1 mate Twat: Are you sure? Me: *Thinking* F**k off knob Better than the comedians reading this stuff.. Jeff Harris..
Jeff HPE Motorsport Posted July 26, 2009 Report Posted July 26, 2009 bloke: they didnt make a mexico estate me: yes they did but there rare bloke: thats like saying they made a 4 door one too.. ha ha me: yes they did one of them too in brown bloke: fookin brown fook off! me: no how about YOU FOOK OFF!! Love it Jeff Harris..
deltamal Posted July 26, 2009 Report Posted July 26, 2009 I was at the Tortworth vintage show today, blokey looks at the engine, "whats that?" it's a 2.4 Cosworth, "I had a 1600 E, put a twin choke carb on it, it did over 200 miles per hour !" I tried to look impressed!
stevepeanut Posted July 26, 2009 Report Posted July 26, 2009 I had a mate at work "my dad had a few mk1 and mk2 escorts, they are just the same car, ones got a boot, the others got a hatchback".......... I've put this one on before. I had my 2.0 laser up for sale for £500 a few years ago him £500 is ok, I'll take it me thats cool him glad its the laser, I got bad arm, I need power steering me it aint got power steering him well it should have, all 2.0 lasers had power steering me I am in the NE capri club, a few lads have lasers, they dont have PAS him well they should, last one I looked at did me well this hasnt got pas him oh thats a shame, I would have bought it if it did
Copey Posted July 26, 2009 Report Posted July 26, 2009 "you do know that those plates are illegal right?" or "those plates are only legal on a pre 73 car"
evil knievel Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 i've had a few... its currently in the work shop... fully stripped ready to be painted, its just being welded... this guy walks in, the bonnet is up, and there is CLEARLY no engine in there... "ooh a capri... what lump you got in it?" one that angered me was this... knob "oh a capri, i used to have one of those." me "every one says that" knob "mmm. they're shit cars. but there good to look at. handle like shit." me *thinking* i bet they handle better than that piece of shit plastic you just pulled up in!!!! i hate it when people say get a new car... if i WANTED a new car i'd King HAVE ONE!! EDIT: Also this one ALWAYS makes me chuckle... i'm 17 and when ever i'm talking about my car to people they go... "oh a capri, is it a 2.8 or... ?" "no. i'm 17. its a 1.6" "they didn't do a 1.6 capri."
Jeff HPE Motorsport Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 Where I used to live back in Wallington Surrey I had several OSF & other sporty cars over a period of a number of years & there was this bloke who would walk past first thing in the morning & later in the afternoon evening time & he used to ask about the cars I had every time I happened to be out tinkering & he became a bit of a pratt but I didn`t want to be rude so I would answer his ridiculous questions with as much stupidity as he would ask! Bloke is that a Irish 2000 mate Me no it was made in England Bloke Is that one of them seewerra Woolworths Me no pick & mix Bloke is that one of those Mr bushy` Me no Mitsubishi Bloke thats what I said He would refer to new cars as (I don`t like Brown new cars ) & he used to have a racing engine in his car once! When I asked what car he said it was one of those Ribbon cars you know the one that only had 3 wheels Me what you had a racing engine in a 3 wheeler what type of engine was it Bloke I dunnow it had one of those shiny tops Me whate a chrome rocker cover Bloke no I`m not into that kind of music I used to hide from him if I happened to see him coming but if I didn`t then it was 10 minutes or so of absolute Sh*te I started to feel sorry for him & would change the subject & then he would lose interest & walk off. Didn`t see much of him after that! Oh well it takes alsorts to make the world go round Jeff Harris..
Admin Vista Posted July 27, 2009 Admin Report Posted July 27, 2009 "you do know that those plates are illegal right?"or "those plates are only legal on a pre 73 car" What's stupid about that? It's use of them willy nilly on cars that aren't eligible to have them that'll get them banned altogether and then no-one will be allowed them. Me? I just let the stupid comments or questions go in one ear and out the other.
Copey Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 its not so much stupid as annoying, i know my plates are illegal but i dont care and i get fed up of being told about it
BIGKEV Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 I get lots of - What is it mate? - understandable as its unusual. someone thought it was a Firenza once - thought thats ok - can see the similarity "Hey mate - Nice Manta - is it the Cosworth Engine" - that one was funny. just point out that they have it wrong and then educate them. Then Interrogate them Then make sure they go home and have a look in the garage for old bits because they might still have some stuff left lol
Mr2Caps Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 I'll never tire of people having their photograph taken whilst shaking hands over the bonnet of my Mk2.........I mean its not like I did that when I bought it...... Its always funny how everybody who has ever 'had one of those' always has had the 3.0ltr the 3100 or the 2.8, its a wonder why ford bothered with the 1.3, 1.6 and 2.0....... I also get things like 'thats got the wrong......' , yeah, thats kinda the point......
SebringRS Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 This ent bout a Ford (well it is kinda) but still quite funny My mum get soooo annoyed with this, its mostly when shes gettin petrol, the guy on the counter always says to her, Guy: Thats Very nice! Mum: Thank you. Guy: Its a Mustang isn't it?? Mum: *Getting angry* No its not a f**kin Mustang!! Guy: What is it? Mum: Its a Dodge Challenger! And another one my dad got, Guy: Is tht your blue Mustang down there? Dad: Ye thats my Blue CHARGER! Guy: *Gets confused, goes quiet for a bit* Thats what i ment, still its very nice.
DanV Posted July 27, 2009 Report Posted July 27, 2009 its not osf related but i did have to laugh when i was hearing stories at work about an old manager that worked there who came out with a lot of ridiculous sh1te, my favourite one being... *Knobber* A guy i used to work with got both hands caught in a press a few years back. Flattened both hands it did! *My Dad* Fook. I take it they had to amputate? *Knobber* No he kept them. Worlds fastest swimmer now he is! Apparrently the old boy got quite offended when everyone thought it was a joke! Where do these people come from??
DarrenM Posted July 28, 2009 Report Posted July 28, 2009 Most times I stop for fuel in this you get " Nice car mate, how many gallons to the mile does that do? " My Capri gets the "is it a 2 or a 3 litre?" Reply " No it's a 5 litre" soon shuts them up!
antz Posted July 28, 2009 Report Posted July 28, 2009 that mustang is sexual! GET MORE PICTURES UP!!!!!
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