bored so lets here some of your funny sayings

[kirk10]

this 1 always makes me laugh

had a curry last night and have still got an arse hole like a sore throat

[Trevmk3]

when describing someone "that bloke over there with the straight hair and curly teeth"

[wolf666]

dont be shy show me your pie

[Retro-gone.]

you know youre getting old when your foreskin gets longer than your nob

[countrybumpkin]

you know youre getting old when your foreskin gets longer than your nob

 

well you should know all about that

 

one that always annoys me is 'its better to of loved and lost than to of never of loved' how the fook is it better to of lost?

[D4N]

'michael schumacher has been practicing his starts down the toilet!'

 

'That curry is going to go through me like a porsche!'

[Deano1351]

Im not as think as you drunk i am!!

[Copey]

sweaty as a pregnant nun

[ratman]

Got a tongue like Ghandi’s flip flop

[davreeve]

"Thats about as much use as mudflaps on a tortoise"

[Durham Fiesta]

she's got a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp

[countrybumpkin]

its blacker than a cows guts

[caprinerd]

looser than a mfi wardrobe

mouth like a gorilla`s armpit

as much use as a chocale teapot

[sab6024]

"about as much use as tits on a fish"

[antz]

when someone feels down 'chin up, tits out'

[accord83]

I've got a mouth like the inside of a charcoal burners clog

[Fast eddie]

my mrs is like a tramps over coat...............................................................always on!!!

[Retro-gone.]

i wouldnt say my wifes ugly but shes got a face like a crashed moped.

 

les Dawson 1981.

[Fast eddie]

retro fords are like a tampax, at some time every c**nts had one!

[MexDan]

About as much use as Anne Franks Drum Kit!!!

[caprinerd]

are you talikng to me or chewing a use tampax , because both ways you`ll end up with blood in your mouth

 

talk to me like that again and you`ll eat your breakfast through your arse because that where your teeth will end up

[Vista]

"about as much use as tits on a fish"

 

I usually find the fishy bit is a little lower down

[Smudger105e]

Much use as an ashtray on a motorbike

 

 

More chance of a sh!t in the Queen's handbag than .....

 

 

 

More chance of a BJ off the queen than than .....

[GT_lenny]

when someone puts "super" unleaded in

 

"Its like feeding a donkey on strawberries"

 

when describing London beer;

 

"Flat as wiches tit"

[Deano1351]

It was in and out more times than a fiddlers elbow!!